Sacrifice 15

Her heart was beating, pulse sounding off loud in her ears, a steady beat that spoke of her nervousness. She wondered if the God could hear it, knowing that his hearing was vastly superior to hers. Alana hoped not, feeling she would die of mortification if Rufus knew how her heart had quickened at his nearness. It wasn’t just that he was close, he was touching her again, a fact that set her on edge, Alana freezing against him.

“Here.” She was conscious of his every movement, feeling his chest press against her back. She could feel him breathing, chest rising in a slow steady movement. “You have the right idea, but it would be better if you put your hands here and here.” His reached around her, muscled arms pressing against her slender ones, his large hands reaching past her wrists. They covered her hands which were tiny in comparison to his, his long, elegant fingers gripping hers, placing them in the proper position on the metal bow.

He didn’t let go of her once he was satisfied with her hand placement, fingers staying pressed on top of hers. She could barely speak, whispering out a reply as he began pressing more firmly against her, urging her to turn with him. Rufus still wasn’t letting go of her, his breath stirring up strands of her hair as he leaned against her. Alana wondered if he could feel the fine tremble in her arms, hoping to pass it off as difficulty in drawing back the bow.

“Not too far now.” Came his advice, Rufus helping her to pull the arrow back against the string. “Anymore tension and it will break. And you don’t want that.”

“Yes….” She thought his words ironic, finding a tension of a different kind was slowly building between them. At least on her part, for Rufus seemed oblivious to how nervous he was making her.

“And when you let go, don’t show any hesitation.” Those words made her wonder if he intended to let go of her anytime soon, Alana squeaking out a reply.

“I won’t!”

“Good. Now on the count of three. One…two…” Her trembles had increased, her hands would have been shaking if not for his support. She could feel the strain of holding back the string, knowing something had to give. Even as she thought that, she was letting the string snap forward, arrow flying free before Rufus could even get out the next number.

Her eyes tracked it’s movements, watching as it sped towards the target. She held her breath, feeling excitement to see it moving in so perfect a line. And when it slammed into the red paint of the center circle of the bulls eyes, she wanted to cheer, feeling she had accomplished something special.

“I did it!” Alana exclaimed, and for a second she had the wild impulse to throw her arms around Rufus. To hug him of her own free will would have greatly embarrassed her, the girl thankful he was still holding onto her hands, preventing her from moving too much. “We did it.” She added, knowing it was his expertise and guidance that had allowed her to hit the target.

“Yes….” He agreed, and his grip loosened, allowing her to turn. “Yes we did…” Those hands of his moved along her bare arms, raising goose bumps in their travel along her skin. It made her shiver, not quite looking at him as his hands ended up on her shoulder, fingers brushing back her hair. She was left staring at the smoothness of his chest, his skin tanned and glistening with a slight hint of sweat.

“So how was it?” Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him move, and she dragged her eyes away from his torso. She looked up in time to see him bending, his face

leaning in closer to hers.

“It was good….” Came her soft admission. He moved closer yet, hands holding her steady. “I think….I think I felt what you feel.” She was distracted by his nearness, almost failing to clarify her meaning. “When you shoot I mean!”

“I’m glad.” Rufus’ lips curved upwards, a smile on his face. Alana wondered what sort of expression her own face wore, knowing she felt her eyes widen as he leaned in more and more. He was simply too close, and his eyes were focused on her lips. He was going to kiss her, she realized this, and yet she just stood there staring at him. She didn’t even try to move, not sure if it was his hands that held her so firmly in place or something else.

But as his warmth breath caressed her skin, she started to speak, almost wincing at how breathless she sounded. “Rufus…” She didn’t know what she intended to say to him, and she never got the chance to figure it out, because another voice shouted out his name.

“LORD RUFUS!”

“AH!!” A mixture of embarrassment and shock over took her, Alana goaded into action, dropping the bow. She placed her hands against his chest, finding his skin was incredibly warm, and she almost jerked back in horror to be touching him like this. Instead she shoved at him, face growing heated as she felt his nipples under her hands, finding he wasn’t budging.

A heavy sigh from Rufus, the God seeming resigned as he let go of her. “Hello Freya.” He was straightening, turning to look at the person who had called out his name. Alana also looked, peering around his body, to stare wide eyed at the woman who actually floated in mid air. She was dressed in the oddest clothing, it was vibrant green in color, and it was so form fitting it seemed painted on her. It was also incredibly short, Alana didn’t know how the woman kept from flashing them more than just her legs as she floated in the air.

Her legs were almost bare, with boots of a short length on her muscled limbs. She wore a green and white hat over her waist length blonde hair. And her eyes were blue, and oh so angry. Alana didn’t think she had ever seen anyone look as infuriated as this Freya did. She couldn’t even think of doing something bad enough to make anyone, let alone the Goddess this angry, and Alana bit back a sigh of relief to see that so far all her attention had been focused on Rufus.

“Lord Rufus…” The Goddess hissed out his name, floating closer towards him. “Just what do you think you are doing? Don’t answer that!” She snapped when Rufus made a sound to reply. Alana’s eyes widened in surprise, not liking the way the Goddess spoke to Rufus. Wasn’t he supposed to be King of the Gods? Surely that title commanded the respect of the other deity’s, or at the very least their obedience.

“Once again I find you shirking off your duties….” She was floating back and forth before Rufus, giving Alana the idea that she was pacing. “Abandoning your post, neglecting your subjects. It’s bad enough you’ve let the paper work pile up, but now this?”

“I just needed a break…” Rufus began, but she cut him off, voice a near shout as she snapped.

“You’ve been taking far too many of those ever since SHE arrived.” Alana took a step back, seeing the Goddess’ angry gaze was now aimed at her. “It’s no surprise that whenever you disappear, it’s to be with that mortal of yours!” Alana’s cheeks flushed, not liking the disdainful way Freya said the word mortal. It was almost as though she was a pet who had done something wrong, someone below human.

“Not always.” Rufus said quietly. “This time it sorta happened by mere chance.”

“HA!” Freya’s attention whipped back to the God, glaring at him. “Do not even try to deny it, when I find you embracing her! I’ve told you before, limit your affairs to the appropriate time and place! Lord Rufus, even Odin knew better than to allow his skirt chasing to interfere with running the kingdom!”

“I am not Odin!” Rufus told her, voice loud but not quite yelling. “You’d best remember that!”

“How can I forget?! You make it woefully obvious with the differences between you two!” She was quick to retort, stopping her floating to glare into Rufus’ eyes. “You may not have liked Odin’s policy when it came to Midgard, but at least he didn’t neglect his duties as King!”

“I am not neglecting them! I’ve just fallen a little behind is all.” Rufus retorted, hands clenching and unclenching into fists at his sides.

“You wouldn’t be behind if you didn’t insist on stopping for lunch and dinner.” Freya said, crossing her arms over her ample sized chest. “Honestly, who ever heard of a God needing to eat?!”

“It’s not about need, it’s about pleasure.” Once again she was rushing to speak, cutting off Rufus’ words, even as she laughed, a nasty sound.

“Oh yes, and lately you’re all about pleasure aren’t you?” She asked, arching a pale golden brow at him. Alana for the most part was remaining quiet, turning her head from side to side, watching. It was very much like a spectator sport, and right now the Goddess seemed to have the advantage when it came time to speak.

“You should try it some time Freya.” Rufus retorted. “It might loosen you up a bit, get you to actually crack a smile for once.”

“I will smile the day you become a true king to us all!” She replied. “Merely sitting on the throne does not a king make!”

“Don’t you think I know that?!” He asked, thrusting his arms wide in agitation. “Don’t you think I am struggling to do right by you, by all of you, both mortal and God?!”

“Hmph!” A sound from Freya, but she did not interrupt him, content to listen to him speak.

“I know I make a lot of mistakes…” continued Rufus, sighing. “That I let things pile up until the last minute…especially lately…but I will make you proud of me eventually. My reign will be one of peace for both Midgard and Asgard, no….for all the realms!”

“You are a fool if you think you can accomplish that!” Freya said, but some of her anger faded from her eyes.

“I think it’s an admirable goal.” Whispered Alana, drawing the Gods’ attention to her. Rufus smiled, but he looked tired, green eyes weary.

“Hmph.” A snort from the Goddess. “A goal that is doomed to fail if you continue to dally here!” At Rufus’ questioning look, the Goddess sighed. “You’ve forgotten, haven’t you?” She asked, Rufus’ still looking confused. It made Freya frown, shaking her head back and forth. “The delegates from Muspelheim are here.”

“Delegates?” It was just one word, but Alana heard his voice go from confusion to shocked remembrance, Rufus seeming to cringe.

“Yes….the represantives of Surt’s Kingdom.” Continued Freya, watching his reaction carefully. “They are most displeased to have been kept waiting this long. Never mind the slap in the face it is to not be greeted by our King.”

“Damn it!” Rufus exclaimed, and he was hurrying towards the bench where his shoes and clothing lay. “Why didn’t you remind sooner?” He hurriedly stuffed his toes into his shoes, hands already reaching for his robe.

“I did remind you.” Freya said, both she and Alana watching as he hastily pulled on his robe, fingers haphazardly buttoning up the front. He missed a button, causing it to line up lopsidedly, making him curse in frustration. “I left you several reminders on your desk, and I did tell you the night before they were coming. Surely you were listening when you nodded and waved to dismiss me from your chambers.”

“I was listening.” Rufus said as he fixed the buttons on his robe. “I just had a lot on my mind. And you should have said something the moment you arrived, rather than make the delegates wait even longer for me to put in an appearance!”

Now she was the one to shrug, Freya saying, “I was angry. Perhaps I let my judgment be clouded.”

“Since when have you ever let anger interfere with the running of the kingdom.” Muttered Rufus, smoothing out his robe. He lifted his hand, ether glowing on the tips of his fingers when he gasped. “Alicia!” He glanced at her, looking startled. “I almost forgot! I have to show you back to your room! Pardon me Freya, this will only take a second…”

“You don’t have time to waste!” Freya reminded him, once again her arms were crossed, and her foot tapped impatiently on the grass.

“But…”

“It’s all right Rufus…” Alana was quick to assure him, smiling. “I’ll find my way back.” A sidelong glance at the Goddess, Alana barely able to believe she was about to suggest this. “Perhaps Lady Freya would be so kind as to assist me…”

“Her?” His disbelief showed on his face, Rufus glancing at the Goddess who looked equally surprised. “Really now Alicia, I think I should do it.”

“You don’t have time to argue!” Alana pointed out, and Freya nodded.

“Yes. You really don’t.” A slight curve of her lips, Freya almost smirking. “Do not worry. I will show….Alicia, to her room.” He was still hesitating his eyes showing his doubt.

“It’s okay Rufus.” Alana said. “I…we’ll be fine. Really.”

“Okay….if you say so.” Rufus cast a glance at Freya, a look of supreme warning in his eyes. It made Alana wonder what that was about, but before she could ask, Rufus was moving, casting divine energy all about his body. As he started to fade from sight, he remembered the ribbon in his hair, hastily reaching towards it to let his green hair spill free.

“So…” Freya’s voice drew Alana’s attention away from the spot that Rufus had last been seen in. “You are his….Alicia, are you not?” She floated closer to the girl, eyes doing a slow crawl up and down her body, inspecting her carefully. Her lips flattened into a thin line of disapproval, the Goddess not liking what she saw.

“No…” Alana said softly, then shook her head, raising her voice to sound more confidant. “No, I am neither his nor Alicia. My name is Alana.”

“Alana…” repeated Freya. “Very well. I will call you by that name.”

“Why?” asked Alana, staring surprised at the Goddess. ”

“Why what?”

“Why would you do that?” She wanted to know, even as at the same time she felt grateful that someone, anyone would acknowledge her true name. “No one here calls me Alana. They all insist I am Alicia.” She couldn’t keep the bitterness out of my voice. “They all want me to become her for him. To become someone I am not. It is…a relief to hear my name spoken by someone other than me.”

“I do not do it to comfort you.” Freya said, face looking haughty. “Nor will I fuel Lord Rufus’ delusions where it concerns you.”

“So you don’t think I am Alicia?” She asked, not sure how she felt about this. She had grown used to Rufus’ insistence that she was, and now to meet someone who thought otherwise was jarring.

“Oh you WERE her.” Freya said, nodding her head. “Of that make no mistake. But that was then, and this is now, and the seal on your memories is simply too powerful to let you be overtaken by your previous life.” Her hand reached forward, Freya capturing Alana’s chin in a tight grip, lifting her head up to peer into her eyes. “Cracks may be appearing, but it still holds. If something like true love could break it, then everyone would remember their past lives.”

“Would that really be so bad?” Alana asked, surprising even herself with that question.

“Of course it would. People need to grow, to change. If everyone remembered their past lives, they would make the same mistakes.” Answered Freya, letting go of Alana. “History would be doomed to repeat itself.”

“Maybe not.” Alana insisted. “People can learn from their mistakes, they change for the better!”

“Are you arguing because you want to remember her?” asked Freya, giving her a sharp look. “Have your feelings changed? It is well known you do not want to be here.”

“It is?” Alana said, not liking the thought of people talking about her. It made her paranoid, made her wonder what they were saying. Freya was silent, just looking at her, and she realized the Goddess was waiting for her to answer. “No. My feelings have not changed on the matter.” Alana shook her head, thinking to herself that to remember might be to lose herself completely.

“I see.” Freya turned, heading to float towards the doors. “I think you are a fool for not wanting to stay here. The sheer splendor of Asgard cannot compare to Midgard, it simply does not come close!”

“I miss my home…I miss my family and friends.” Alana told her, then shrugged. “I guess you wouldn’t understand.” She moved to follow the Goddess, staying a few feet behind the green clad woman. “So…” Alana cast about her thoughts, thinking of how Freya had interacted with Rufus. It had been more than subject and her King, one simply did not speak to royalty that way. Unless….she could feel her eyes widening, a thought she found horrifying occurring to her. “Lady Freya…you and Rufus…you’re not…not…” It was almost too awful to say, she found herself faltering on the words.

“”Are not what?” Came Freya’s question, the Goddess not even bothering to turn to look at her.

“You’re not….married are you?” She asked, thinking the pieces fit together. Not just from the way she acted, but also her disdain of Alana, and her use of the word affair.

“WHAT?!” Freya stopped so suddenly, that Alana walked into her back, nearly falling over in the process. The Goddess whirled around, eyes wild with surprise and disgust.

“Mistress then?” Alana asked, and saw the Goddess grow even more agitated.

“Heavens no!” breathed out Freya, her body racked by a shudder. “As if I would ever have anything to do with Lord Rufus in that manner. He does not interest me in THAT way. Of that I can assure you!” She radiated sheer outrage at the thought, looking at Alana as though she thought the girl mad.

“Ah….forgive me for making assumptions.” Alana apologized. “I have just never seen anyone speak to Rufus that way. I thought….well…never mind what I thought.” She said blushing.

“Hmph.” A scowl from the Goddess, and then she was moving again, not even checking to make sure Alana followed her. “Rufus and I are close. Necessity binds us together. He would rule, and I would see him do right by this kingdom. I am merely his advisor in all things involving the kingdom and his behavior while at court.” She snorted, running a hand through her hair. “I do not approve of what he does in his free time. This kidnapping is most unpleasant business.”

“Can you not reason with him?” asked Alana, wondering if this would be her chance to get home sooner than the allotted year she had given him.

“Not in this matter. Besides…”

“Besides?” Alana asked, curious as to why the Goddess had fallen silent.

“It is nothing.” Freya answered, turning down a corridor to their right. “If you want to be happy here…learn to like him.”

“I do like him!” Alana said, then gasped, bringing her hands up to her mouth. She couldn’t believe she had just said that, and she shook her head, hoping Freya wouldn’t repeat that tidbit of news to Rufus. “Just…”

“Just not enough to want to stay with him.” Finished Freya for her.

“Yeah.” Sighed Alana.

“Then you indeed have a problem.” Freya said.

“It’s only for a year…” Alana sighed. “I can hold out for a year.” A soft whisper from her. “I have too…” The Goddess had no reply for her, seeming content to lead her in silence. Alana followed her, and soon they reached a familiar hall, the corridor packed with servants.

“I trust you will be able to find the way back from here.” It wasn’t a question, the Goddess was already gathering ether around her, seeking to make a hasty retreat.

“Yes.” Alana agreed, biting back a sigh as Freya vanished from the hall. No one else reacted to the Goddess’ teleportation, long used to such sights. Alana nodded at the servant’s who met her eyes with questioning looks, the girl not really in a mood to stop and converse. She was too consumed with her internal thoughts, wondering when she had started to like Rufus enough to feel alarm at the thought of him being married.